In three weeks, my maternal grandparents, 75 and 77 years old, will celebrate 53 (!) years of marriage. For the past week, my husband and I were blessed enough to spend some quality time with them. Their winter homestead is in the Hill Country of Texas and we drove with them. Some would say we drove them to Texas - there is a bit of hesitation within my mother's family to have them make the 1300 mile trip on their own, simply due to their age and the health struggles associated with being in their seventies. I initially pitched the idea to my grandmother in October and she immediately figured that it was a setup. In part, it probably was - but it quickly developed into quality time with them that I know both B and I will always treasure.
In that week with them, we were able to learn more about them and, most importantly, experience their fierce devotion to one another. It's a devotion that isn't terribly overt - it's not romanticized and it's not overly affectionate, but it is a quiet, strong, fierce married love. They show it in the simplest ways - Gran helping Grandpa get his coat off, holding his hand as he walks down the stairs to the car, and the like. Perhaps the most memorable for me was a simple moment in the middle of the week - we had arrived in Texas in the midst of one of the coldest fronts experienced by the Lone Star State in recent history. Temperatures didn't get out of the forties (and sometimes struggled to reach them) on Wednesday and Thursday. As we were preparing to watch the BCS Championship Game (Longhorns/Tide - which didn't turn out as my Texan husband hoped it would), my grandma was in the living room reading the paper. My grandpa went to their bedroom to retrieve something, and returned with her new bedroom slippers, a gift from her children at Christmas.
"I brought you your slippers, for when your feet get cold," he simply replied, handing her the shoes as he took his seat to watch the game.
"Well, thank you, dear, that's wonderful...for when my feet get cold," my grandma replied.
My husband and I exchanged glances and my eyes nearly teared up as we watched them interact. My grandfather was diagnosed with Parkinson's disease in late 2005 and has a limited range of motion due to his hips and knees being replaced several years ago. Often his fastest gait is nothing but a shuffle, and it takes him awhile to get from place to place. Yet, he had the foresight to make this simple act of love for my grandmother - just bringing her slippers to her, something that I doubt was a small act of exertion. It wasn't a grand, blissful, emotional declaration of his love for her - but it probably spoke more volumes about his affection for her than any bouquet of roses or messages in the sky could ever speak.
It was such a wonderful trip and B and I might not have the opportunity for this time alone with them in a long while. What began as "chaperoning" - as my grandma snarkily called it the night before we left - turned into some really beautiful time with them, learning more about them, and experiencing those small witnesses to their married love, which, in three weeks, will be 53 years in the making.
B and I are so blessed to have these wonderful examples of married love that we can learn from.
a presto.
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